Snowy days...

Brrrrrrrr.... its so cold at the moment. The snow has finally arrived here and bringing with it my winter cold. So feeling a little sorry for myself with all my aches and pains, tissues at the ready and revolting cough medicine at my side. I struggled on for a few days, running the children back and forth, filling the fridge up, cooking up some meals in case I got worse, so I could just pop them in the oven. I managed to get my study done and my time in school.
Then it just floored me, this little cold of mine, I gave in, I watched the weather change and turned up the heating, pulled out my favourite quilt and hit the sofa...
I managed a couple of hours, all cosy and sleepy, the puppy curled up at my feet like a little hot water bottle...I even watched a movie, well I sleepily watched a movie, the guilt I felt of lying down, even thou I was ill, overtook me. What is it about us mothers, why do we not allow ourselves the time to heal ourselves?

If our children or loved ones got ill, we would make a warm nest for them to hunker down in and feed them healing chicken soup, read to them and hug them until the illness has passed by. However when we are ill, the caretaker, the cook, the provider, we soldier on, making ourselves worse and grumpy in the process. No use to anyone really and the example we give the children is not a good one, we should take care of ourselves and drop this silly guilt.
So for the first time in years I let this guilt go...It was not easy...I looked after myself, I fed myself and allowed myself to be looked after. I slept when I needed to, I had long hot steamy baths in the evening when the boys had fallen deeply asleep, I stayed in my PJs and the sofa became my cosy place.
So after a weekend being fed nice food, being given the time to fall asleep when tiredness overtook me, managing a little hand sewing and some knitting time whilst curled up next to the fire, letting go of this guilt has been good for all of us, the children are happy and whilst I am still sniffing and coughing I do not feel angry and frustrated, I feel rested.

I believe guilt is such a curse for us mothers and I want to always let it go, I know I cant, but a little bit at a time, well it helps...

PHOTO'S 1) View from the Kitchen window, all snowy hills. 2)Lap tray of hand sewing, little corsages in the making. 3) Finished spring corsage. 4) Cutting out Spring Bunnies 5) Easter Book Covers.